The Gappious

 

When you hop on board a train

Or perhaps the underground

You never know what lurks below 

What monster can be found

 

There is a beast so ghastly

I just hope you never meet

Him close to you, face to face 

Or creeping round your feet

 

The Gappious (or Gap for short)

Is how the beast is known. 

And if you're ever caught by him

Your journey will be thrown 

 

Into chaos and a right old mess

As this monster is a pain

He'll mess up your day in the strangest way

So you'll hate going on the train. 

 

First off the Gap makes sure

That every train is late

He enjoys nothing more

Than making people wait

 

Then he waits til you are boarding 

And for the exact split second to close

The heavy pair of sliding doors

Trapping your bag or clothes

 

Next he makes sure your possessions

Are always left behind

Your hat and umbrella aren't anywhere

The Gap is so unkind! 

 

But these are just his party tricks

The worst is yet to come

It's by mind controlling passengers

That Gappious has his fun

 

He makes sure all the people

Are simply very rude

Sitting with their feet on chairs

And loudly eating food

 

Or making sure no passengers

Ever says hello

The people all stand staring at the ground

With the Gappious laughing below

 

And when the doors are opening

Some people even push!

Others talk loudly on their phones

And simply will not shhh

 

So the next time you are travelling 

Upon the tube or train

Just make sure the Gappious

Is not controlling your brain

 

Defeat him with your manners

Don't just stare down at your feet

Say 'how do you do' and smile or at others

Or offer elderly people your seat

 

Say words like 'please excuse me'

Or even 'after you' 

And if you meet someone doing the same 

Remember a big 'thank you'

 

As between us we can do it

We can stop this little beast

And then we can all go about our business

And ride the train in peace

 

So next time you're in London

Be a pleasant chap

And if you use the train or tube 

Remember to